So Its Time

To say goodbye from the blog. 

I have decided to end it here. Yup another project started but never finished.

I thank you all for reading, following on bloglovin, but it's just got to be done.

The last couple of weeks, I've been making decisions, about life, my family etc and to be honest since I've had this fresh mindset I've been looking at things/people a whole lot different. I've noticed a fair amount of bloggers, whom not only try their best to make you feel like shit about yourself but your writing too. They all stick to their clicks. These click are formed based on things like follower counts, post counts, blog views etc etc. I'm not saying all bloggers but a few which makes me want to leave the playground and step away from the Mean Girls. You tweet/follow them, they don't tweet or follow back, what's the point? Surely you rely on followers to pitch your blog, to get you more readers, yet you never say thank you, or even recognize you have done them a favour.

Blog subjects......now my blog wasn't of a specific genre, it was all the random cramp that I had going on in my life. Rant posts and lots of photos (especially when I didn't have time) this wasn't acceptable from what I could tell. I simply made my blog to ease congestion in my brain, releasing any self doubt, moans and other bits and pieces that if I had kept locked in would have driven me to not have enough room for the good times and memory's. 

I'm not into fashion, I simply wear what is comfy and is easy. So technically, a what I wore Wednesday post because I don't think tracky bottoms and a hoody would be 'what people would want to see'. 

I don't do make up because I have super sensitive skin, I use all cosmetics and lotions that are PH neutral and are classed as boring....... The same products I've used for the last 18 years or so....... Who wants to see that?

I'm too unhealthy to preach about weight loss/gain, exercise and good food. To be honest my car has gained most of its milage from driving to and from the local McDonalds drive thru :) I'll have a Chicken Sandwich Meal large, no salad extra mayo and a slice of cheese....... Oh and a diet coke please. And then a sneaky trip into the shop to get me a couple of Redbulls for the afternoon.

Technical guru...... Does getting my 12 year old to turn the laptop on count?

Mummy blog....... 2 children, one almost a teenager, with an attitude that is out of this world...... Using words that I just simply don't understand...... Also a 4 month old, who eats, sleeps, shits repeats.... Oh she is being weaned now..... Yup again boring right. Plus a lot of people have been moaning recently that new parents post too many photos and stuff about their kids online, I mean I agree and I'm a snap happy new parent, however 50 pictures of you breast feeding your child is in my opinion too much.

Cookery - did you bypass the McDonalds quote above...... No I didn't think so.

So anyways I'm officially declaring my blog, finished.... Ended whatever you want to call it. 

No I'm not looking for sympathy. I'm not looking for oh no we will miss you's or anything along those lines. I'm simply telling it how it is. 

So from my blog it is goodbye. I hope you have enjoyed reading :)

byeeeee

This Is Real.....

This is me, I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. 

A bit of a random post today really, as right now I'm trying to decide my future, trying to decide what's best for everyone and mainly trying to steer myself in the correct direction that I want my life to go in.

Many of you will know I'm currently on maternity leave from work, which was followed on from a spat of sickness from work due to many issues that could have effected my pregnancy, so for the health of myself and my unborn child I decided to take myself out of the situation. Now the time has come for my wages to drop to just SMP and it's a choice do I return or look elsewhere, for employment, like a fresh start...... I'm not sure the grass is always greener, so this dilemma is set and I need to decide what to do. I could carry on with SMP pay, but I know there are bills to pay, mouths to feed, so technically that's not an option! I emailed my current work to ask for a possible return (keeping my options open) I requested a working from home day, I asked about my notice period and if I would have to pay back my maternity pay if I left during my maternity leave, I also asked would I be returning to my previous job. The response I got was a little off putting to say the least.

The response was:

They will cut my notice period from 3 months to 4 weeks.

I can hand in my notice so as I don't have to return at all and I wouldn't need to pay back my maternity pay.

Reading this I believe they are trying to make it easy for me to quit. Like they are giving me the opportunity to leave rather than have to deal with me? I'm currently job seeking elsewhere because ideally I would like to leave, however maybe I should return just to annoy them. Maybe I should return, work my magic and get the department sorted and working fabulously (like it was before I left) but then I think why should I? I could return take the easy ride and do what my colleagues do......? 

See my dilemma? It's a choice that only I can make! It's toughie.

We are planning on moving next year, can I return to work until then and leave then? Or shall I go elsewhere? Gahhhhh

Sometimes I kinda wish I wasn't an adult making big choices! 

My situation all boils down to lack of confidence. Mine has been totally shattered then I lost pieces of shattered confidence over the years! I am proud that I've got 2 amazing children and a wonderful partner who treats me like a princess, but I still have no faith in myself.  I can be withdrawn, meaning I sometimes have trouble sticking up for myself. I get upset very easily also making getting a point across difficult and normally ends up with my apologising for showing emotion rather than being adult about a situation!

It's the same with the situation at work which is making it incredibly hard for me to decide to return! I wish I didn't want to run away and leave the situation as it was before. By the time I return I will have been off work for a year. Yes a whole year! A lot can change in a year, but I fear nothing will have changed and it will go back to me being in tears everyday, being treated differently to everyone else etc!

There has been a meeting called at work for Thursday (2 days time) I'm really nervous, I'm getting more and more nervous as the days go by! It's just a meeting to discuss my flexible working and to set a date to return!! 

Eeeeek! 

I guess what will be will be. I shall attend the meeting on Thursday with my boss (who hates me) I can normally read a situation well and will make my decision based on that meeting. 

Life is just too complicated sometimes :(

Any advice would be great x 

Half Term In Pictures

First things first Happy Easter to you all x 

So half term has come around again rather quickly. It feels like a week since they went back after the last holiday.....

This half term, I decided that me and Lee would go out together. It's been ages since we had time together without baby J in tow. We packed baby J off to her nans house and me and Lee were set for a few fun days out.

Day out 1 saw us visiting the London Eye, Dungeons and the aquarium. The weather wasn't great but we had fun all the same :) 

Day 2 saw us visit Chessington World Of Adventures. We are Merlin Pass holders which means we get into the Tussaud group attractions as many times as we like in a year. It makes visiting the attractions a cheap and fun day out. Lee even won Baby J a donut :) 

We also waited patiently one evening to watch the ISS fly by. We stood on the balcony waiting and finally clear as anything it went over. Very exciting moment. Being in London it's rare to see it as clear as we did. I had one happy boy afterwards.

2 days out and lots of DVD days, crafting and time spent together has been excellent. It's been well overdue. Lee seemed to have enjoyed it too, shame that Hubby couldn't join us but a brilliant 2 weeks. 

Mummy also had some me time. Not only was a poorly which actually drove me to my sick bed, but also meant time away from the kiddies (didn't want them to catch it) not fully recovered but I got the chance to meet up with a good friend we went for shopping and cocktails in Camden :) just what the doctor ordered. We must have walked what felt like a million miles in a few hours, the stables market is enormous I forget how many times we got lost or walked the same way! Confusing times that you have the same things being sold on ever other stall yet varied prices? The goths and punks have been replaced with tourists and more tourists, which is such a shame. Busy was an understatement! Rammed everywhere we went! But a brilliant day all in all! 

Cocktail 1 - came in a pitcher :)

Lunch was..... Sausage and Mash :) yummy.

Cocktail 2 :))

Cocktail 3 - C.S Cowboys, this lightweight mummy who has not had a drink in over 18 months :) was a lil giggly

Last week I also managed to paint my toenails, wash and blowdry my hair! Believe me this is big thing as Baby J is very time consuming :)

Easter is finally here, Lee once again got way too many Easter eggs. This makes for a lazy day at home, heating on and lots of family time. DVDs and playtime with baby J and Lee :) 

What have you all been up to? Been anywhere nice and fun?

Country Roads Take Me Home........

Many of you may be aware that this time nest year our dreams are coming true. We are moving from the big smoke into the country. We have our plot of land its just a case of planning permission and actually building.

Now when we get there first of all we were going to look for a property to rent, until we had ourselves sorted, with work, schools and were settled in properly. Now looking at the renting market, its not bad price wise. A 4 bedroom semi detached in the next village would cost in the region of £375-£400 per month, however when we move we wont have income straight away and we think it would be hard to meet those costs as well as living on absolutely nothing, but a small amount of savings. This wont obviously last forever so don't want to use it for unnecessary outgoings.

We have been thinking about different types of living, We looked at pop up houses, converting a bus, temporary timber framed homes, the list was endless. That's until we looked at static caravans. Yes, yes I know what your thinking, how very 'traveller' like. How can anyone live in a tin box. (I am going somewhere with this honest) I have been searching online all day. I have found some excellent examples, which I believe most people would absolutely love. There was obviously some that were awful, which had the brown curtains and equipped with pull out beds in the living room....... Don't panic this wasn't the look we were going for either.

Now please let me show you some pictures of inside I found.

Now I know many of you wont believe me that these are all static caravans, but you have my word. I was shocked too. I would be happy with all of these interiors. Now price ranges. Cost wise one of these amazing looking static caravan will set you back between £16,995 for a two bed and £25,000 for a 3 bed top end of the market one. Most places where you buy these will deliver and site them for you. The bedrooms were not massive, but were lovely and homely all the same. It would indeed help us de-clutter and get rid of anything that isn't needed! Some of the kitchens in these bad boys are to die for. Again not massive, but enough room to do what is needed.

Onto the outside, now amazingly once a brick base is laid and adding some decking you can own something that looks like:

As you can see they look like real homes. Obviously you would need to lay a foundation and pin it to the floor, however when you buy from actual companies they will include delivery, set up and plumbing in too.

Have I sold the idea to you? I will never be able to afford to buy a decent home in London, the housing stock for housing associations and councils is practically all gone now and the only choice I have is to move, as far away from London as possible. Obviously the static caravan isn't a permanent solution, but if we can save, whilst earning once jobs have been found then we could build a bigger home. One that I love, maybe even afford a swimming pool :) ok maybe not. Now unless I win the lottery before I move I think this will be what our temporary home will be.

I would love your thoughts, or even to hear if you have done something similar.

All images from Google/Ebay/AutoTrader

Monday

As it is Monday I thought I would give your minds a break from reading. My weekend in snaps x

My weekend lots of mummy and princess cuddles.

Brother and sister play time.

Drinking tea and relaxing.

Ended up with a candle lit meal with hubby. No mcdonalds was not our first choice but everywhere else was too busy.

Happy Monday people x enjoy x

A Little Catch Up!

The last few weeks have literally flown by, once again I've fallen behind with absolutely everything! Emails, texts, blogging..... Everything! Another cheat post for me today just to update you on what's been happening & what I have been up to.

Princesses new wheels, the other one I bought broke and had to send it back, this bad boy jumped out at us..... So had to have it x we are hoping this will last a while longer than the other one x

Weather has been glorious, so of course making the most of it, been walking lots and getting some much needed Vitamin D :))

England were at Wembley, the boys attend all the England games :)

Finally managed to sort out my hair! Have wanted to go this colour since I fell pregnant! 

Baby is changing everyday, she laughs at you now. Lots of moments I've been snapping away. Every moment I'm trying to capture. I vowed that I would take more photos and I have certainly managed that.

I celebrated my 32nd birthday on the 13th of March, hubby always gives me money, because I am really hard to buy for. I've got everything I need (I'll admit that) and want. But I found a new bag and purse which I purchased. Handbag from Zara £29.99 and Purse from River Island £10.00. 

I also waved goodbye to my trusty IPhone 5S this week. I decided I needed a change. I was/am bored of iPhones, mainly because they are literally all the same, I felt it was time to move on...... Hello to my new Samsung Galaxy S4..... So far I love it. The camera quality, the screen size, the optional ringtones for free from an app called Zedge. 

Poor quality photo but pink glittery tips, I normally go for standard pink and white, however fancied a change.

I picked this book up in asda a while back, to be honest never thought I would get chance to read it, but hubby gave me a wonderful few hours child free time, which made me start the book...... Finishing it, seemed to take forever :) but I did and I thoroughly enjoyed it. From cover to cover. It was one of those books which I couldn't put down! I highly recommend it. Available in the Asda 2 for £7 range and available also in kindle store for £3.98 (when I last checked) go get it now!! 

I'm hoping to return soon, but I won't promise as I seem to be busy with baby.

Anyways baby is stirring and requires a bum change and feeding x

Till next time x